The Waaaghriors!

Race:  Orc
Coach:  Brian K.

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Jan. 30th, 2018 - old news
Sleepdoze Bruise-Brain is back!!!
Hi Folks! Mick McMurty here, second cousins brother-in-law to the original Mick McMurty of McMurty's Big Moot Sandwiches.

We at McMurty's Big Moot Sandwiches are just so thrilled to see the comeback of Sleepdoze Bruise-Brain, a linemen for the newly minted Orc team, the Waaaghriors! Back in his heyday he was an extremely agile and skilled Blitzer, able to dish out blocks and catch those pesky dodgy elves before they had a chance to bring the squig-skin home. Many a play has ended in tears for his opponents' teams as he would intercept or otherwise wrest the ball, an object whose value in the game still puzzles him to this day, and run in the direction his coach would yell at him to run to until intercepted by some fans or a wall.

He acquired the new name Sleepdoze Bruise-Brain after a mysterious ailment began to take his skills, coordination, and mind. It all started during that season when his former team, the Cheap Chumps, installed budget cuts for upkeep of team equipment. For instance, Sleepdoze Bruise-Brain didn't have a helmet that whole season but thankfully he survived so it was a wise move for the Cheap Chumps to not spend money where it wasn't needed. Quite unfortunately though, it seemed that elven magic was at work to slowly take away his abilities over the coming seasons. He began to have migraines, was easily confused, and would be very sleepy all the time! Fans have high hopes for this player but the coaches have seen his current skill and have assigned him as a linemen now until he can reprove himself.

I think the issue with Mr. Sleepdoze is low iron. I heard that low iron makes your brain more susceptible to Elf magic and can make you sleepy. I just thought of something, did you know that McMurty's Big Moot Sandwiches are packed with iron? Between each of the three patties in the sandwich is a layer of nails. It is sure to keep your sandwich crunchy and prepare your stomach for any meal. Come have a McMurty Burger today!
- Brian K.
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